Tuesday, February 3, 2009


Do you think it's a good thing or a bad thing that I always want to write "Kasha Kiki" on the name space of my schoolwork instead of Caroline (real name)? I've been doing that since last Thursday and it's vair annoying.

Today at school, I learned that I really hate running for long periods of time. We had to do this test today called the pacer. It's when you have to run from one side of the gym to the other along with a recording. You have to make it to the other side before a beep sounds, and the beeps get closer and closer together every minute. Torture! I'm good at sprinting, but I am just not meant for this "cardiovascular endurance" stuff. After I did all the laps I could (37) I felt like dying. My chest hurt, sinuses were congested, eyes were running, my body ached, and my gums (?) really hurt. Hate gym class.

Breakfast. Mmm. Not many pictures, but part of it was dark chocolate raspberry oats!

Lunch was pretty boring and repetitive so no pictures. As part of my snack today, I had plain Stonyfield Farms yogurt with strawberries. Stoneyfield yogurt is my favorite, and this was so much better than the icky Euro-style stuff I got from TJ's!

My dinner had to be eaten in between my cello lesson and therapy. I made a tofu scramble, I guess? With very random veggies though. I cooked up 1/3 block of silken tofu in olive oil. Then I added rainbow chard, carrots, mushrooms, peas, a bit of soy sauce, and lots of garlic powder. So not the typical combo, but still good. I had it with an apple pie Larabar, my favorite! I want a Purebar though. I also had a banana.

I've done lots of snacking tonight, but the highlight has been this dark chocolate coated gingerbread cookie. My mom brought it for me, someone at her office brought them in. Nummy!

In other news, I didn't tell my mom about the blog today. I had maybe half an hour of free time today, and most of it was spent reading your lovely blogs! I had no time to write a decent letter. But, I have no plans tomorrow so I can spend all the time I need writing a letter. Today at therapy, my therapist said "Are you still taking pictures of your food?" And I said "Uhhhh no. Well not all of it." Which is partially true. I know she thinks that this is just another little obsession, and I'm afraid that my mom will think the same thing. Ahhh!

Good night, lovies!

P.S. NO! Call me Kiki! Kiki is the pet name that my sister gave to me when we were kids. I let the people who are close to me call me that, and teachers and stuff call me Caroline.


Peanut Butter and Jenny said...

oh don't worry girl I am not a runner either!

and oh my god - I had no idea your real name was Caroline! I've been calling you Kiki! I'm so sorry love! Good to know :)


ChocolateCoveredVegan said...

Oops lol haha I've been callin ya kiki. Well, you will always be kiki to me ;o)

Mel said...

ahhh, the pacer test!! i totally remember that from gym class... glad to hear you survived!! don't worry about telling your mom about the blog-- just explain exactly what it means to you and how far it's helped you in recovery. Have a good night girl :-)

Anonymous said...

I got that European style yogurt from TJ's the other week, and I thought it was awful, too! I like tangy yogurt, but that stuff almost tastes like it's gone bad! Glad you're back to the good stuff.

Anonymous said...

kiki is sucha cute name ;]

i remember having pacer test in gym too!

I hope everything goes well with the letter! good luck my love<3

Anonymous said...

Ew, running sucks. I only run when I want to...which was actually today but it wasn't as hardcore as that. Gym class is horrible, I wish it wasn't required.

Yummy foods girl, your dark chocolate oats are amazing.
Ooo and tofu scramble! WOO! haha

I love both of your names, caroline is such a beautiful name and kiki is so fun. Which ever you prefer darling.

Laci said...

Hey Kiki1
Wow I can't believe I've gotten to know you so well in only a matter ofdays through these blogs! AWSOME!!! =)
OMG I can't believe it WE did the pacer test too and it sucked! so tiring/embaressing... I can tell you what I got if you want (just request on your next comment, I don;t want to brag!) and either way, it wasn't the best but surely not "unhealthy"... though I kinda still am! Well, closer each week but still pretty lankey... I love how we're going through similar hardships around the same age... most people seem to be so much older than us and even though it's great to have older "wiser" bloggy friends, it's kinda lonely feeling so young. I <3 the comments YOU leave me... even if you don't realise it I can totally hear your voice through the computer! =D
P.S. I know what you mean about the photos... I kinda doubted them but then I though "I'm not getting worse, are I? Mom won't critisize much any more" (like she used to constantly WORRRRRRY!) and I think I'll just keep doing them until I decide not to... maybe until complete recovery? (unless I end up making more AMAZING baking/edible creations, more professionally along the lines of Hannah Kenimsky! In my dreams, that is! ;0)

Sharon said...

Love your cute nickname, I have always called you Kiki! And oh my gosh, the pacer.... I remember it... I died. LOL

Brooke said...

caroline!? so beautiful, i love that name :) and i love your dark chocolate raspberry oats!

im sorry about your gym class. ive never been a runner and i never will be! i almost failed in gym - yikes! but you will do great! best of luck sweetie :)

sweet dreams! <3 you

p.s none of my therapists/doctors/nutritionists know about my blog. i really don't think they would understand...

Breaking Free said...

Aww, Kiki, Caroline is such a lovely name. And I know how you feel about those sprints. My basketball coach used to make us do them, up, down, and up again. We would do sets of like 10 or 11 and if one of us was really slow, he would make us do another one. It was torture!! Great eats today! I love the apple pie lara bar!

dollymixtures said...

Oh my god I HATE the pacer/bleep test! I remember the last time I did it at school...It was just after summer, when I was stil full into my ED, and really dangerously ill, I could only do a couple of laps and felt like I was going to collapse! Was a bit embarrasing that I had to pull out before all the really chubby people! D:
Good luck telling your mum, I'm sure you'll be able to make her understand. And the name Kiki is so cute ^.^

Megan said...


and chocolate-covered gingerbread cookie? uh, hello AMAZINGNESS.

i'm SO glad you said your gums hurt after the running, because that happens to me ALL THE TIME! my teeth and my gums like, THROB! it's so creepy lol.

Anonymous said...

There are SO many Carolines on the blogosphere it's crazy!! Kiki is a cute nickname though :)

LOVE the apple pie lara :)

Erin said...

yum yum tofu scramble!
why are you such a FANTASTIC COOK!?
how was that apple pie bar?!
are you in higgghh schoool?!
fressshie year?
gotta love it.

and you!

Anonymous said...

Ah, the bleep test. You know that thing should be banned for use in junior schools & in some places it is - little kids have died doing it. Heart defects haven't been picked up until they do the test as it is their first time being placed under heavy cardiovascular strain & then its too late - just a piece of useless info for ya that I've learned doing sport science.
Anyway, about the therapist & your mum. If you really feel that taking pics isn't harming your progress then fine. Only you know & I think by not keeping the blog a secret from your mum you are showing her that you are not trying to hide anything (I know how secretive ED can be).
Take Care x