Heyyy lovelies. Sorry for not posting yesterday. I don't want to go into specifics but let's just say that some old overexercising habits got the best of me. I was not in the right state for blogging. Feeling better for the most part today.
I woke up earlier than normal this morning (accidentally) so I had extra time to make breakfast! I'm back to my big breakfasts for a couple days because I'm still afraid of getting hungry at school. I'll try to challenge myself more this weekend, though. This morning among other things I had blueberry cashew coconut oats! We've had a bottle of TJ"s 100% juice sparkling blueberry juice sitting in our pantry since Christmas and my parents cracked the bottle open just recently. So I cooked my oats in 1/2 c of that, and topped it with chopped cashews and flaked coconut. Mm mm mmmm.
This picture is from yesterday but it's exactly what I had today, but an apple instead of the pickle/ razzies. T'is a grilled whole wheat wrap filled with dill hummus, cream cheese, lettuce, cauliflower, carrots, and sundried tomatoes. So much better than a PB sandwich! Plus a kiwi lime passionfruit Rachel's (3rd favorite flavor) and a Zbar.
Before ballet, I had an apple with cheese. Afterward I had a cashew acai protect Think Fruit bar.
I quite liked this bar. I can't say that it had a strong berry taste though, the sweetness of the dates overpowered the acai I think. But, it did have really big chunks of cashews, which I love. And it was denser and less sticky than Larabars, which makes for optimum bar-breakage. I think I'll buy this again just because of the texture!
Ballet went badly again, along the lines as it did on Saturday. I feel so certain that this intuitive eating has made me gain masses of weight! I know that this is stupid and irrational and that I'm doing the right thing for my body, but I honestly don't care. I swear that every time I walk into that studio I look bigger. I can't even dance well because I feel like this new weight is just weighing me down. When I was twenty pounds lighter I could dance a lot more easily. I'm sorry for being so negative in all my recent posts! ED could be making me imagine all of this but he sure is good at making me believe it.
My dad was working late for dinner which means that me, my mom, and my sister had to have breakfast! We made orange french toast. I loved it, it reminded me of creamsicles! We only had crappy "lite butter" maple syrup, which I don't go for. So I topped my french toast with applesauce and a shmear of PB. Nom.
I also had a lot of this delicious fruit salad, made of strawberries, banana, grapes, canteloupe (which I avoided because it is vile!) and pinapple.
And for dessert I had a Thin Mint. At first I wasn't going to have any Girl Scout cookies because they have trans fat in them, but less than .5 g because it doesn't show on the label. Any food with trans fat is a major fear food for me. I convinced myself to have one because these only come once a year, and my dietitian/the girls in my group always tell me that there is no one food or ingredient that can make me fat. It was.. good. But not great.
Love you all lots! I'm off to do some HW and then watch GOSSIP GIRL!!! It's been too long... night!