Ballet!

Like I mentioned yesterday, today was my first day back at ballet since November. I love dancing, and seriously would dance everyday if I had the time. Apparently I was one of the few who practiced over our break, so it was quite amusing to watch everyone else stumble around!

More on ballet later, so let's start with eats, yes? The other day I gave Fay my recipe for baked banana stuffed french toast because she said she wanted something sweet for breakfast. It's quite a weight-gainer's recipe though, with about 500 cals per serving. Fay had a little kitchen mishap trying to make a healthier version of it, so this morning I fiddled around and came up with a new recipe that works pretty well, and it significantly lower in cals. I give you baked (or not) banana stuffed french toast.

• 2 slices whole wheat bread, on the thinner side
• 1 egg white
• 2 tbs milk
• 1/4 tsp vanilla
• couple dashes cinnamon
• 1/2 banana

1. Mash the banana with a fork. Sandwich it between the two slices of bread.
2. Whisk together the egg white, milk, vanilla, and cinnamon.
3. Plop the banana sammich down in the egg mixture and let it soak for about 30 seconds. Flip and repeat.
4. Heat up a small pan sprayed with cooking oil, or with melted butter/oil or whatever floats your boat.
5. Put the french toast down in the skillet, on medium high heat. Cook for 2-3 mins until the egg is set and it's kind of crispy. Flip with a metal spatula and do the same thing.
6. Optional step: Bake at 350* for 4 minutes on each side. I usually skip this step because I'm lazy and don't want to heat up the oven for one thing.
7. 

It's not exactly as good as it's fullfat cousin, but it's still pretty yummy!

So after breakfast + a boring morning snack (almonds) I headed to ballet. Like I said before, the whole dancing part was fabulous. Really, I love to dance so much! No, what bothered me was the mirror. I've been avoiding the mirror for the past few months, other than to do the necessary things like brushing my hair and whatnot. I haven't been standing in front of the mirror letting ED pick apart my flaws and tell me how fat I am. But if any of you have ever been in a dance studio, you know that you are surrounded by mirrors there. Every way I turned this morning, I could look in the mirror and see something I hated about myself. My stomach pokes out more than hers. My face looks so blobby. My thighs touch, oh god, my thighs touch! I know I probably sound like such a drama queen baby right now. But arg I feel like my body has changed so drastically since the last time I was in the studio, and I hate it so much! It really lowered my self esteem, and kind of took away from my actual dancing. My feelings of disgust over my body are pretty much gone now, but I know that they'll come back every time I go back to my dance studio. This was I guess a mini-rant because ED takes away every single good thing in my life, but I'm so scared to stop him.

OKAY! I went to Trader Joe's today, wopee! In that stash is soy milk, TJ's olive oil (amazing), eggplant cutlets, 2 flavored yogurts, big tub of Euro style yogurt, PURE BARS (!), a zbar, fruit leather, and soy frozen orange creamsicles. I also got apples and crystallized ginger too.

For dinner, I made tangerine baked tofu from Vcon. But I had no tangerines, so it was clementine baked tofu. It was good, but my tofu always turns out really mushy. I don't know if it's because I don't drain it well enough, or just because it's not fried.
Also some sweet tater fries, yum! Hope you all had lovely Saturdays and enjoy the rest of the weekend!